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NEWS > BUSINESS > AMAZON SET TO RELEASE “BABELER”
AMAZON SET TO RELEASE “BABELER”
April 29 2008
Seattle, WA – In the wake of the success of the Kindle, Amazon announced today that it will be releasing the “Amazon Babeler” in the United States by the end of the year. The news was well received by Wall Street with Amazon.com (AMZN) closing up 5%.
Similar in shape and size to the Kindle, the new device will allow users to automatically download text from any website in the world, alter it so as to be completely incomprehensible, and then upload back onto the site, over riding the original code.
“It essentially is like the biblical story,” said Amazon president Jeff Bezos. “There is great deal of concern about the globalization of the internet, how it is bringing people from all different cultures together. With The Babeler our goal is to separate people as much as possible and create confusion, much like God did. In our increasingly connected world we run into the danger of the common man becoming wealthy and successful, and we as the wealthy and successful cannot allow that to happen.”
Critics have already come out hard against the E-tailer, concerned not only with the association with a higher being, but also the potential hacking and privacy issues with the new device.
“They are encouraging hacking of websites. I don’t even see how that can be legal,” said Arthur Holdenstock, a web industry analyst. “The whole idea of a major corporation encouraging illegal activity to no real end seems ludicrous. They are going to have a fight on their hands I think.”
A spokesman for the Christian.com, while critical of the association with God, spoke out positively for the device. “It is essential for Christian ideals that people be separated as much as possible. It is much more difficult to indoctrinate people when they have broad access to information. We fully support the Babeler and can’t wait to get our hands on it.”
Bezos was sympathetic to the criticism, but undaunted. “Sure there will be issues. Let’s make it clear here, the Babeler will not be able to access our website or any of our partners. Only the little guys. Those are the ones we are trying to weed out. As far as our public persona goes, we are not concerned. God invented Babel and look how it turned out for him.”
The Babeler will be released in time for Christmas at a MSRP of $399.99 USD.
William Ashford, Business Correspondent
NEWS > BUSINESS > AMAZON SET TO RELEASE “BABELER”
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