NEWS > BUSINESS > MICROSOFT MULLS NAME CHANGE TO MEGAHARD

New York, NY – A leaked internal memo has sent shockwaves through the investment community as word comes that the Redmond Washington giant may be contemplating a name change. Amongst other notable comments in the document the company is apparently looking to update its image in the wake of Bill Gates’ departure as day to day manager.
Megahard is apparently the name du jour amongst the MS board, denoting a slightly harder edge to the company, a stated desire in the document. Other names mentioned are “RockinSoft”, “ComputerGod”, “Iamyourleader”, and “Weowneverything”.
“It makes some sense,” said industry analyst Drake Wilson. “I mean you lose that brand, and you have to repackage and re-sign everything, but I think it’s a good idea. I mean, let’s face, Gates is a bit of a geek and a softie, and that name just emphasizes that. By breaking away from him they are a new company, and this title just seems fitting.”
It goes without saying that any potential change in name would have massive ripples across the entire business community, though the document seems to indicate that the idea is simply in the planning stages right now.
“It’s interesting, but I question whether or not it’s an attempt to change the image of the company, or if it’s simply an attempt to get a little bit of free press. You know press never hurt anyone,” said an insider who preferred to remain anonymous. “I really doubt the sincerity, but you never know. More importantly I think, if they do go through with this, is what kind of change this will bring to the company’s philosophy is any. Everyone knows that they have been very aggressive with mergers and acquisitions, perhaps now they will become even more aggressive.”
Indeed, that aspect of the business may already be shifting. The “Embrace, extend, and exterminate” (a term supposedly used internally at the company) philosophy that has so marked the company over the years, surged up again earlier this year when they announced a bid for search engine Yahoo, a merger that would easily be their most aggressive move to date.
“I don’t know if that is related in any way to Gates’ move from the company. It is an aggressive move to be sure, but they’ve never been shy about that in the past,” continued analyst Wilson.
Another insider who still works for the company spoke to us confidentially.
“Things have definitely changed since Gates’ left. There’s no other way to explain it. The first thing I noticed was that they changed all the glass doors on my floor to wood ones. And then we started using this new heavier paper for all our documents. It really feels like things are getting harder.”
Microsoft reps had no comment on the document.
NEWS > BUSINESS > MICROSOFT MULLS NAME CHANGE TO MEGAHARD