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NEWS > BUSINESS > WAL-MART TRIES TO COVER UP BLACK FRIDAY DEATH WITH INEXPENSIVE FLOOR MATS

WAL-MART TRIES TO COVER UP BLACK FRIDAY DEATH WITH INEXPENSIVE FLOOR MATS

December 5 2008

Bentonville, AR – With Black Friday now a memory and the holiday shopping season in full swing, Wal-Mart is dealing with an altogether unexpected type of Christmas surprise, Murder and mayhem. Now the discount giant is doing the best it can to have shoppers forget about the unfortunate death of a worker at a Long Island location by offering deep discounts on variety of products intended to make walking upright easier for the discount shopper.

The retailer has entered into a deal to carry heavy duty floor mats and anti slip safety shoes, though they deny that the purchase has anything to do with the tragedy.

“We want people to be on sure footing through this Christmas season .We realize that the economic conditions are the best they have ever been and we want to do our best to make sure that people have their feet firmly on the ground,” said a spokesperson for the company. “While I cannot comment on the tragedy that occurred I want to assure all our shoppers that that situation was an isolated one that will not be repeated. We just want to ensure that people aren’t concerned about coming into our stores this Christmas. Our stores are totally safe and ready to provide you with all your shopping needs.”

The company will also be offering the shoes and mats to their employees at an increased discount in an effort to ensure that there will not a repeat of the tragedy, especially with the ice and snow that is tracked into the stores during the winter seasons.

“Wal-Mart is about providing the best products at the best prices for our consumers and we are best positioned to do that if our employees are standing upright,” continued the spokesperson. “We will make sure that all of our employees are standing vertically when you enter the store, and provide you with the best customer service possible. We want people to feel safe and shoppy and not worry about the possibility of being trampled or otherwise maimed as you cross people off your Christmas list, and at Wal-Mart you can do that.”

Of course the new products are little comfort to the family of 34-year-old Jdimytai Damour who was the temporary worker killed in the Black Friday stampede. Nor it appears do the mats offer any assurance to local shoppers.

“They’ve got these themes on them, like characters and stuff,” said one Bentonville shopper. “They’ve got like Hannah Montana and the Jonas Brothers, which is fine I guess, but they also have a Fat Albert one. I thought that was a little too close to the bone. Not that the guy who got killed was fat or anything, just the idea of this big flat black man laying on the ground gives me the willies.”

Wal-Mart had no comment on the nature of the mats, only stating that “selection varies from store to store.”

Few are expecting the death to have any significant impact on the retailers Christmas season. With the economic slide worsening Wal-Mart revenue is only increasing as shoppers seek to squeeze more value out of their thinning wallets.

“Things like this rarely have an impact on shopping. Even when the worker was killed people just kept on shopping like nothing had happened and that isn’t likely to change anytime soon,” said Scrape TV business analyst Ken Green. “People have to get their shop on and they will do that no matter the consequences, obviously. If there’s stuff to buy, people will buy it and if they trample a few people to get to the top, so be it. That’s the way capitalism works. At least now with this deal they will be able to do their stepping with a little more solid footing. Blood and guts can get slippery, especially on tile floor.”

William Ashford, Business Correspondent

NEWS > BUSINESS > WAL-MART TRIES TO COVER UP BLACK FRIDAY DEATH WITH INEXPENSIVE FLOOR MATS

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