NEWS > EVERYONE ELSE > IN POSSIBLE LAST STRAW IRAN BANS SIMPSONS DOLLS, POGS, MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER RANGERS
IN POSSIBLE LAST STRAW IRAN BANS SIMPSONS DOLLS, POGS, MIGHTY MORPHIN POWER RANGERS
February 6 2012
Tehran, Iran – There has been, arguably, no time in history when Iran was a more significant force in the public imagination. While people will look to the Islamic revolution, or Iran Contra, or even the Fatwa on Salman Rushdie as the most incendiary moments in the history of that country, now is the time when things have reached a fever pitch, dwarfing all those historical examples.
Perhaps sensing that their time is now and trying to milk it for whatever they can get, or perhaps just being well and truly insane, the regime in that country is making sure that any chance they get they are grabbing the attention of the world and making it pay attention.
Aside from the ongoing nuclear options, and the war games with threats to shut down vital oil pipelines, Iran has also come out and launched a verbal assault against old foe Israel, with Ayatollah Khamenei vowing to kills all Jews and destroy Israel, an action from which there seems no coming back. Now though the country has taken another controversial step against the West, one that may mark their split from the rest of the world for good, banning all pop culture icons from the early 1990’s including, but no limited to, Simpsons dolls.
“The Simpsons dolls are merchandise from an animated series, of which some episodes are even banned in Europe and America. We do not want to promote this cartoon by importing the toys,” said government spokesperson Mohammad Hossein Farjoo.
The ban forces the Simpsons into the same category as Barbie, pogs, and The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers as undesirable western influences in the country.
Simpsons toys have not officially been banned in Europe or America, but might as well be considering their languid sales numbers.
“It’s pretty clear to everyone outside Iran that just about everyone hates them, except of course to Iran itself. They seem to have this desire to keep antagonizing the rest of the world despite having already well earned their hatred and disgust. It’s strange, them being so out of touch with how everyone else feels,” said Scrape TV International analyst Gustav Hander. “Perhaps that is the core of the schism between Iran and the rest of the world. Perhaps they are just really, really out of touch with everything that is going on across the planet. These toy bans may be indicative of that because it appears that they are stuck in the early to mid-1990’s, culturally at least, not physically. We would feel the effects of that if that were the case.”
The Simpsons are technically still on television but have not been held huge cultural cache since their peak years in the 90’s.
“I think most people would have assumed that Simpsons toys were effectively banned around the world already, but maybe that isn’t the case. Of course there could be crates and crates of them in some massive warehouse and the only way to get rid of them was by shipping them to countries that didn’t know any better, like Iran, but that looks like it will be a problem now,” continued Hander. “Perhaps they can be melted down and turned into something useful, or just melted down, not in the nuclear sense, just the melting plastic sense. At least a blob of plastic can be used for something.”
Iran has also placed a ban on all ALF related merchandise.
Emil Uliya, International Correspondent