FLORIDIANS GETTING READY WITH COMPLAINTS ABOUT RESPONSE TO HURRICANE ISAAC
August 25 2012
Miami, FL – It’s hurricane season, and how, and Florida is about to be pummelled by its first storm of the season, Hurricane Isaac. The keys and much of the southern coast of the country are bracing for the impact of Isaac which has upgraded steadily from a small Tropical Storm to a full-fledged hurricane in recent days.
Isaac has been steadily increasing in intensity and will likely be at full strength when it strikes the Florida Keys and Louisiana, at minimum, causing millions of damage and killing a number of people. Already residents have started to board up windows and hunker down inside their homes instead of running away a few miles to the north where it will just be a little windy.
It’s believed that many residents are spending the time working out exactly how they are going to word their disgust with the state and federal response to the crisis, blame the President, and make their claims to their insurance companies about stuff they never really owned or was broken long before the hurricane arrived.
Isaac is expected to make landfall by Sunday night.
“As Isaac moves up over the eastern Gulf, a return flow from the west and southwest in the wake of the storm can bring a storm surge along the Florida west coast,” said meteorologist Alex Sosnowski.
Some of the worst of the storm is expected to strike Miami where people are going to be very angry about having their vacations ruined and not being able to get a refund.
It’s not yet clear how many people will die and how much the governments will lose in fighting lawsuits related to those deaths.
“I’m sure this is going to be a big deal to many of the residents of this area and every single one of them will not only be angry, but very wet which is likely only going to aggravate their anger even more. There’s little that is more frustrating than being wet and not being able to get dry. That just sucks,” said Scrape TV Weather analyst Graham Gilliam. “Hopefully they can get some dry towels and calm down a little bit. I mean if they were to just go a little north for a little while they themselves would be fine but I guess if you do that you run out of reasons to complain and get on the national news and really who doesn’t like being on the national news. It’s practically the reason to live in Florida.”
Indeed, aside from the Heat winning the championship hurricanes are about the only exciting thing about life in Florida.
“Hopefully we don’t see a massive death toll like we saw with Katrina. That’s unlikely, I would bet, because there are a lot of white people living in Florida and I’m sure if it comes to that, if it gets that bad, there will be no shortage of supplies and personnel on scene,” continued Gilliam. “So at least they have that working for them, being white or at least being around white people. I knew they were good for something.”
It’s believed that white people will end up being the most wet and thus the ones most likely to sue about being wet.
Mike Michaels, American Correspondent