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NEWS > U.S.A. > TEXAS DOESN’T LIKE IKE BUT STILL VOTING REPUBLICAN

TEXAS DOESN’T LIKE IKE BUT STILL VOTING REPUBLICAN

September 12 2008

Galveston, TX –Residents across Texas are scrambling to get out of the path of the ever strengthening Hurricane Ike as it makes its way towards land. Forecasters are estimating that the storm will make landfall late Friday or early Saturday and could be as strong as a category three.

"Unless you're fatigued with living, I suggest you want to take seriously a storm of this size and scale," said Michael Chertoff, head of the Department of Homeland Security. "This is not a game of chicken with Mother Nature."

His statement was in response to a perceived lack of urgency on the part of a number of residents, residents who have seen Hurricane warning after Hurricane warning in the last month. Concerned officials are doing their best to move people from the storm’s potential path.

"Do not take this storm lightly," continued Chertoff, "This is not a storm to gamble with.”

Of course Hurricane fatigue isn’t the only obstacle. Aside from the typical Texan fighting spirit, the storm also carries the name of a beloved former Republican President. In a largely republican state, two months before the election, some are seeing the name of the storm as a sign they will be saved its destructive power.
“I’ve voted Republican in every election I was able,” said 82 year old Galveston resident George Gray. “I voted for Ike in ’52 and ’56, best damn President we had. This storm being named after him is fate, telling us that the Republicans are coming in and sweeping things clean this election. Ike’s back and he’s angry. The fact that it already hit Cuba is proof in my books.”

Tropical Storms and Hurricanes are named in six year cycles, with significant storms being retired. The name Ike has no relation to the former President according to weather experts.

“The names are random depending on the number of storms in a given year,” said a spokesperson for the National Weather Service. “I understand that people might want to make connections but any similarities are superfluous, and if it’s going to cause people to stay in their homes, dangerous. I do not believe that this Hurricane hitting Texas has anything whatsoever to do with the upcoming election and recommend people in its path get out immediately. This is a very serious storm and people need to use their heads not their guts.”

While the majority of residents have evacuated the area—which includes parts of Houston—the stragglers are worrying even the highest officials.

“We want you safe and secure for the election,” said President Bush. “Please get out of the way of the storm. The Republican party needs you alive.”

Mike Michaels, American Correspondent 

NEWS > U.S.A. > TEXAS DOESN’T LIKE IKE BUT STILL VOTING REPUBLICAN